i’m soft-spoken and i have a voice not fit for a king
with tons of responsibilities, that required speaking.
definitely, no one would hear me if i made a speech
and the public would suddenly deceive me
and i would be responsible for my own deficiency.
i’m soft-spoken and someone told me
i have a voice of a tiny cockroach;
when you step on me, it’s like i don’t bother.
honestly, not the best insect to describe me.
i could be a bee, people would surely believe
because i often buzz around their ears,
they won’t swat, they’ll just leave me to be.
i’m soft-spoken and the teachers that met me
often asked me to speak louder
whenever i am presenting to the others
all around me,
like the air that is surrounding me
because i am losing most of my breath,
the ears of the people,
and my courage too.
i’m soft-spoken and i have to repeat myself
more than twice, probably thrice
in order for them to hear me right,
i cannot even function well in loud areas
where i have to speak louder
like the little boy who cried, “wolf!”
and then, no one will come running for him.
i’m soft-spoken and i ought to be a humble mumbler
i don’t expect anyone to imagine me scream
or maybe everyone would ever think it’s uncanny
for someone, so gentle, to yell to their limits.
many would think it’s ironic
or a story from a fairytale.
surely it’s not impossible,
it’s just improbable at the moment.
i’m soft-spoken and when my voice sounded gentle,
that doesn’t mean i’m a fragile teacup
when you break it, i would shatter to tiny pieces,
and when you step on the sharp parts,
you’ll hurt yourself like how you hurt me.
and no, it’s not the work of karma.
you probably felt a pinch of pity,
even though, i’m the most wanted criminal
my face is nothing but an innocent being.
i’m soft-spoken and people think i’m scared
if i became a champion, i wouldn’t be there
to get my trophy, they will think i have stage fright,
and my valedictory would sound like an obituary
for me, when my name would be destined to the grave
of cringing moments when i could have fought back
or pretend that i don’t even bothered getting the prize
because there is no thrill for my pride
or maybe i’m truly am scared
or my voice is beginning to tear.
i’m soft-spoken and i want to let you know
that it took every ounce of courage
to spat out a phrase for you
as loudly as i can be
all the way up until my out-of-oxygen meter
will hit to the very top.
i know, personally, that i am not physically loud
neither do i considered myself dreary,
take a look inside of my mind,
it’s louder than my voice.
i’m aware that if i speak,
my speech would slip and blent in with the other sounds
and i’ll be another white noise in the room
of people who could never stop talking.

i’m soft-spoken and you may think i have nothing to say
when my voice is hiding at the back of my mind
waiting to come out on pleasant days.
i’m soft-spoken and you may think i’m boring
with all the murmuring of a little mouse
waiting to be attacked by the ferocious cat.
i’m soft-spoken and when i don’t speak
it does not necessarily mean that i’m on a bad day
i’m just waiting for you to initiate
when my mind is busy wandering in outer space.
i’m soft-spoken and me being magnanimous
should not be seen for my weakness,
i may not tell you about it
because i do not wish to interfere with that topic.

i’m soft-spoken and yes, it’s shocking to see
what a person could write
more than what she could have said
in a normal verbalised colloquy.

i am soft-spoken and no,
i am not weak.


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